We’re friends with the bailiff. The judge says “oh, you guys again — good to see you.”
Thankfully it’s good to be seen. It’s because Brittany and I have undertaken a project as we cross-adopt our kids. I adopted Cam in 2022, Brittany and I adopted Carter in 2023, and here we are, kicking off 2024 with another round as Mac and Zac will be adopted by Britt. Once Lexi is adopted (a more complex operation as she’s an adult under guardianship), this work will be done. Piles of paperwork, lawyerspeak, multiple court dates, and more to come.
As if the work will ever be done.
We’re about to throw a graduation party and send a few off to college this Fall. We won’t have to worry about them anymore, right? Ha! Not from what I’ve heard. You never stop being a parent, even when they become adults and move out. The relationship doesn’t go away, it just changes. Sure, we might count the days until they’re feeding us mush and changing our diapers, just as we did when they were little. A lot will happen between here and there — cars, college, jobs, and (not yet, lads) grandkids. We’re in no hurry to jump from parent to grandparent. But we *are* taking nominations for Grandparent names. I have a few ideas. How does this sound: “Are you kids ready to go to Bougie and Busendorf’s house for family Christmas!?!”
We prioritize our kids, and with little choice otherwise as everyone in our family unit has experienced trauma and the needs are profound. Don’t get the idea that Brittany and I are heroes. God has made us equal to the task. And don’t get the idea that our kids are a disaster, either. Each one is doing very well and trompin’ along through each day, some better, some worse, and many in-between. It has never been easy.
We all went through great pain in our individual journeys that brought us to this collective spot. Nobody would choose what we all experienced. But we can’t just stand by and wait to see what happens. All of our kids need — and deserve — two parents.
Okay, so I said before that I don’t want people to think of us as heroes. But I want to half-reverse that and say that my wife Brittany *IS* a hero who went from 2 kids to 5, including one with special needs. She has navigated all the legal ins and outs with finesse and brilliance, and it wouldn’t have happened without her. But she’s more than a paralegal in this whole thing. She’s a mom who tripled her case load and loves all 5 of her kids so well. Everybody has what they need and then some because of Brittany, and I couldn’t be more grateful, proud, and in love with her. She continually amazes me as the obstacles of life turn her into a warrior queen. Sometimes it scares me a little.
She loves Mac and Zac. She wrote a letter to the boys that includes “I didn’t give you the gift of life, but life gave me the gift of you.”
What do you do when there’s a mess? You clean it up.
We see God’s gracious fingerprints all over this situation. Yes, it’s a project — a rescue project. And the next part of the rescue happens tomorrow.
(R) Adam Davidson 