I was snagging lunch with a fellow pastor at the jazzy and swanky Union in downtown Kalamazoo. He and I meet a few times a year for food and fellowship, always at The Union, and always on Tuesday, because that’s the day burgers are really cheap – like more than half off. That’ll do, cow. That’ll do.
We both ordered the Angry Burger, which is basically a cheeseburger with a Siracha Mayo topping and some jalapeños. That’s why it’s called angry: it bites back, both at the meal and later on (in case you were wondering).
As I ate my cheeseburger, I did the math. I needed more calories, and this was the cheapest way to get more calories, as well as more protein and some outstanding sautéed vegetables. After I finished my Angry Burger, I ordered another one of the same. The server thought I was joking (admittedly, I’ve dad joked before re: their refill policy on the pop and also the hamburgers, ha harrr haarrrr, so her skepticism was aptly warranted). Eventually she believed me and hit Ctrl+C, then Ctrl+V on her restaurant terminal.
You read that right. I sat down, ordered lunch, ate it all, and ordered the same thing again and ATE THAT MEAL TOO. Like a glutton. Or that one guy from Popeye who loves hamburgers. Google suggests Wimpy was his name and that he looks like this:
But I did the math and, I promise, social graces aside, this was the best way by far to procure more calories that weren’t essentially Pizza. I’m not sure why I’m so adamant to defend myself on a blog post that my friend Ed (and about 20 other people) will read, and it’s not that I fear being judged. Or… maybe I do fear judgement? Is that the burning in my stomach?
No, wait. That’s the Angry Burgers. I’ll be ok.
- Am I the only one who has done this before?
- Is Siracha a condiment or a subculture? People sure are into that stuff right now. Are you, or is it too spicy?
- Do you have favorite restaurants that you go to specifically for the timely discounts? Any suggestions for some sweet deals? Protein is important. Thanks.