Fat Tire Bikes

I’m planning on buying one of those fat tire bikes.  You’ve seen them around town.  It’s like a Monster Truck and a Huffy hybrid.  My friend Dan said that the nice thing about the fat tire (phat tire?) bikes is that you can ride over anything.  “Anything?” and he said yes.  I like that, because I plan on riding over anything.  And everything.  Whether I’m on a paved trail or a dirt path, there I’ll be, trucking like we did in grade school, the wind in my hair and the sky endlessly above.

My sister pointed out that the folks at Lego® have created a bike helmet that looks just like the toupee of a minifig.  So I researched it and found the project attributed not to Lego® but to Playmobil®, yet another site said it was just a concept piece meant to entice aging hipsters like me.  It worked.

The silver and teal mountainbike I’ve been riding until now was purchased for an outlandish $18.99 (Eighteen dollars and 99/100th of a cent) from a Salvation Army Thrift Store.  That was in early 2013.  It has since turned to ash (the bike, I mean).

Bikes are a wide-berthed economy.  Seems like you’re either going to spend a few hundred bucks or a few thousand, with not many options in-between.  I ride, but not seriously enough to buy a two-wheeled car.  Then again, maybe it’s like a nice suit: you spend $$$ but get to use it for many years.  But what if someone steals my suit?  Then what?  No one likes it when a pastor does a wedding in sweats. If I did a beach wedding, it’s no problem, since Hawaiian shirts definitely come in my size.  But until then, I’m sticking with the fat tire bike and the suit from J.C. Penney’s.

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